Tory Democracy: Another Vote Rigging Scandal

Oh dear. All's not well with
the soul of the Notting Hill set. After almost thirty years watching party politics from within I've seen a few things in my time. But rarely as gut wrenchingly shocking as Webcameron's latest "Ask Dave/id" corruption.
The system is simple enough. Registered readers at Dave/id's own bells and whistles multimedia blob try to come up with incisive questions that cut to the heart of Dave/id's new 'policies' and 'principles' for the Cuddly-Nu-Tories.

It's all to play for as a friendly one-reader-one-vote poll decides which five questions Dave/id is asked to answer. Like Blair, his young pretender Dave/id "The Future" Cameron wants to be seen as a "pretty straight kinda guy". But it seems that as sure as knighthoods follow loans the whole thing has quickly become completely crooked.

Tories simply cannot organise a valid and trustworthy poll within their own benighted organisation. How can we trust them with the real thing? And I'm not referring to Coke here.

The big picture (above) shows the cordoned off crime scene. Stable doors have been shut. But the Tory Horse has bolted.

The detailed one (below) spells out the shocking revelation that self-serving Tory types will stop at nothing to get their own selfish me me me agendas implemented.

These poll cheats are working round the system's in-built security.

This allows only one vote per registered member - a bit like having an electoral register and a unique polling number - but I'm led to believe that the Tory hoodies are:
- borrowing other people's identities without their knowledge and voting several times - the crime of personation
- making up completely bogus identities and registering these - deeply fraudulent
- assembling gangs and family groups and using their alpha status and inducements to boss the voting - manipulation and treating
- organising a last minute rush so the tellers are overrun and the opposition wrong footed

Remember if you're a Tory - looking out for number one - it's gotta be a case of vote early vote often.



We'll report back on whether the strenuous new security measures will re-establish the honour of the party.