Friday, October 17, 2008

Comedy Councillors: Rochdale Lib Dems Slap Schtick




Readers may remember one Councillor Dale Mulgrew - supervisor of one of the worst Social Care services in the country - getting touchy recently over his dad Jimmy Cricket's ridiculous welly boot award.

Many thanks to the alert reader who draws my attention to this Rochdale Online report in which our hero was elected, rather unexpectedly.

Dale is naturally incredibly proud of all his father's hilarious achievements. Mentioning - in his acceptance speech this is - that "Cricket's new CD, of Irish Songs, is out and a snip at only a tenner!"

Paul Rowen MP said, "This was a result that sent shockwaves through the Labour ranks. It just goes to show that positive campaigns win elections. It was quite clear that Dale's fight was not with the other parties but to improve Balderstone and Kirkholt."

But this was in fact a vote for comedy Paul. Tragi-comedy as it turned out. Mulgrew's Balderstone & Kirkholt improved so much that it has made a National Top 100 Chart! Slipping from absolutely nowhere into the top 100 most deprived areas in Britain! And Social Care from one star poor to no star laughable.

Rowen continued: "I have known Dale for many years and I am not surprised that he is now a member of our growing team. His Godfather is none other than my predecessor, Sir Cyril Smith MBE. I know that Cyril is absolutely delighted.

To adapt from Jimmy's marvellous patter: "Really it was killer asbestos*. But business is business." Hollow belly laughter echoes down the guilty ginnels and haunted back passages of Emma Street. * Moses in 'Jewish Stereotype' "joke".

26 comments:

Anonymous said...

The Lib Dems have an agreement with United Utilities to evict Council tenants who fall behind with their water bills.
Bet they're glad the voted for Dale & Co.

Norman Smith MBE said...

And there was brer Cyril swearing that Water was safe as houses. What a lot of comedians we Rochdale "Liberals" are!

Everybody Hates Chris said...

Those are fascinating ward stats, Chris. Any chance of a source?

Chris Paul said...

Oh Rob, have you lost the use of your google today?

Try IMD2007 for latest - showing SOAs 5466, 5482, 5484 and 5568 in Rochdale, all in the top-100. Try IMD2004 and IMD2000 for previous efforts. Some small changes in methodology. Less between 2004 revised and 2007.

Chris Paul said...

PS SOAs are smaller than wards. Four maybe per ward. Like EDs. And those SOAs are ranked 17th, 15th, 11th, 47th in that order. So I could have said top-50.

Everybody Hates Chris said...

Alas, Chris, I have a feeling only one of those SOAs is in the ward.

Would you care to revise your original comments?

Or not?

Chris Paul said...

No Rob That comedy councillor promised to boost "his" ward. Alongside puffing his dad's mediocre maudlin muppety Irish songs album.

Instead it - the area as I stated - has got worse with one or two of its SOAs into the top 50 WORST in the country. Have you even checked how many?

And he is making a mess of Social Care to boot. He is a comedy councillor Rob. Why would I revise my comments? After all I have already advised that SOAs are smaller than wards as I realise this is jargon.

Here's another POI:

Super Output Areas

(Not Special as some doh! brains recall incorrectly. Mea culpa)

Chris Paul said...

Couple more comments Rob:

1. The 2000 published data was based on wards. 2004 and 2007 published data was on SOAs.

2. Close inspection of the rubric suggests that Dale cannot be expected to take too much responsibility for this dip in his ward's fortunes ... though then Council leader now MP Rowen, now MP was in the chair during the deterioration.

His real test will be the April 2010 figures.

3. Rochdale went from two to four very poor (top-50) areas during Rowen's reign as Leader. With one area becoming the very worst in the whole country for unemployment.

Everybody Hates Chris said...

I understand the concept of a Super Output Area, Chris. Don't worry, I get the fact that they are smaller than wards.

You say that four go to make up a ward. Actually, it's more like six but I suspect thay you lighted on that amount because that's how many you decided to list in saying which of them constituted the Balderstone & Kirkholt ward.

Only one slight problem with that - three of them are in wards other than B&K.

Actually, it would be very difficult for them to make up any ward at all seeing as they don't even bloody touch.


So you could indeed have said the ward is in the Top 60. You could have said anything at all as you are obviously making it up as you go along.

If that is not true then I would be intrigued to see what document you have that has put these four SOAs in Balderstone and Kirkholt.

Anonymous said...

So, is the other area EHC is being so anal about Spotland & Failinge?
The thiefdom of Cyril Smith for the past 50 years.

Deprivation and devestation- a hell of a legacy for "the man that has done so much for Rochdale".

Chris Paul said...

Before the ward and constituency boundary changes there were various discrepancies in the numbers of voters in both and there was certainly no great consistency in the number of SOAs "per ward".

In Rochdale there are 135 SOAs I believe and in the new arrangements 27 wards. Which makes FIVE the average answer in Rochdale.

'Twas yourself Rob who called these "fascinating ward stats" and myself who pointed out that they were not "ward stats" at all and that SOAs were smaller than wards.

You sir are a pillock, and yes yes yes we know ...

Wally Range said...

But since the wards were redrawn and equalised in eletorate there is very little discrepancy in the number of SOAs per ward.

There are 20 wards in Rochdale, not 27. That makes an average of nearly 7 SOAs per ward, not 5 as you have just claimed or even 4 that you claimed yesterday.

Can you confirm that only one of the four areas you quoted is actually in the ward of Dale Mulgrew?

Wouldn't that rather tend to piss on your statistical chips?

Chris Paul said...

Don't have any statistical chips wally. This is a tease. But based on a fact viz. that before Dale was elected no part of his thiefdom was in the top 100 most deprived areas (out of 30,000 or so) but two years later it was announced that Lib Dem Rochdale had DOUBLED it's deprivation hotspots and that Dale had copped one of these. ALL FOUR are in the top 50 most deprived.

Are you suggesting that this have been some great achievement for Lib Dem Rochdale? That the whole of Dale's ward isn't in the top 50 of 30,000 super output areas in the country?

Looking at the 3% most multi-deprived areas is interesting. That's about 1000 SOAs. Perhaps someone will post a map of those versus Rochdale before long. Doggone! Perhaps I will myself.

"It's not the whole ward!" is not much of an upside for such a slump in performance now is it?

Mole said...

Dale Mulgrew is the worst portfolio holder for social care that Rochdale has ever had.

He has overseen a series of shocking audit commission assessments that have branded services in Rochdale "poor". An example of Jimmy Cricket junior's fine work can be seen here.

http://www.rochdaleonline.biz/news-features/2/community-news/8496/87yearold-blind-woman-left-without-home-help

Adult care services are so bad that the council was downgraded a star as a result.

The Supporting People programme for providing housing services to the most vulnerable people in the Borough recently got zero stars.

Has anyone done more to hurt the poorest people in Rochdale than Dale?

I doubt it.

Anonymous said...

But it's actually down to the comedy council leader Rowen rather than the comedy councillor isn't it?

Dale could be expected to turn round the tragic slump form Rowen's tenure as top dog now could he?

Anonymous said...

PS The desperate estates in Dale's ward that is. Down to Rowen. But the appalling debacle of social care is to be shared by the pair of them.

Mole said...

For classic comedy value check out Cyril Smith's 1999 CD release of the Laurel and Hardy movie song Trail of the Lonesome Pine.

It was recorded with 'It Aint Half Hot Mum' actor, Don Estelle.

Unlike his godson's success in getting Balderstone in the top 50 most deprived areas in the country, it never registered in the pop charts.

Cyril is said to be annoyed that his now deceased friend, Estelle, was asked to make a cameo appearance in The League of Gentlemen while he was overlooked.

Anonymous said...

Sleeze, corruption, poor performance, taking credit for 'great' projects like the Rochdale Town Centre redevelopment, Kingsway muddy field and £200,000,000 Metrolink taking over the train line for a short trip down Drake St (past Fib Dem HQ), the 'great' work of the Rochdale Development Agency (15 years, millions wasted on fat cats and dodgy deals)...

Rochdale Lib Dems. All wearing gold wellies and don't know left from right.

Proof if it is ever needed that these politicans are good comedians but comedians don't make good politicians.

I bet nobody is laughing in Rochdale.

Everybody Hates Chris said...

Yours is not a ‘tease’, Chris, it’s an outright lie. Or even a series of lies

My charge against you is not merely that you are not including the whole of Cllr Mulgrew’s ward. Of the four areas you have claimed he represents, the truth is that only one of them is in his ward. The others are in Milkstone & Deeplish, Spotland & Falinge and Kingsway. At least two of them don’t even border Mulgrew’s ward and the third does so but is separated from it by a motorway, a railway line and a canal.

Of the seven areas in his ward, one of them is indeed in the top 100 most deprived in the country. But it is a lie for you to say that this happened after he was elected. I repeat, that is another complete lie of yours.

And yes, I am certainly disputing your claim that the whole of the ward is in the most impoverished 50 of 30,000 (32,000 in fact) in the whole country. You are not even close with that claim. You will find that the next worst part of Balderstone & Kirkholt comes in at Number 467, then 1186 and so on with one clocking in at nearly 22,000.

So, you are only quoting figures for one small part of his ward, three of the four areas you quote are not represented by him and the situation came about before he was elected. Other than that I’d say you’ve got it pretty much spot on – except that there is no “other than that”.

The only facts that you have got right in all your contributions to this thread is that 3% of 32,000 is roughly 1,000 and that there are 135 Super Output Areas in Rochdale. All the rest is wrong.

Chris Paul said...

I have not claimed Mulgrew represents all four desperate SOAs in Rochdale. Or even that his whole ward was in the top-50 least well served by comedy in the country. I have simply claimed his area is now listed among these desperate failing LG areas now, whereas when he took over it was not.

You Rob Adlard are the one who PRETENDED these were "ward statistics" and then later claimed that you know what SOAs are. So are you just being a devious little scumbag? Yes, I do think so.

I have acknowledged above that Mulgrew was not at the helm for the 3-year period, ending in 2005 in which the deterioration occured. I introduced this information. But I have pointed out that it did occur on Paul Rowen's watch as Council leader. Despite this and his general weakness and lack of redeeming features the people picked him over mad Lorna. So be it. Hopefully they will see the error of their ways and pick Simon next time they get a chance.

I really don't understand Rob Adlard why you want to spend time defending these Rochdale Lib Dem muppets. Do you want a share of their toxicity? Are you thinking of becoming a Lib Dem as others have done before you? I'm not surprised at attempts to conflate coal and asbestos because you are from a mining area and ? family.

But defending these muppets?? Why why why why why?

You need to develop a sense of humour, a sense of proportion, and a tease recognition antenna.

Litmus Strings Attached said...

He's not worth it Chris. Adlard is a complete and utter waste of space. An argumentative little tosser.

You never said "ward", he did. You never said the four SOAs were in Dale's ward, he did. And you pointed out that while Adlard was faffing about with his false claims Mulgrew was in the clear anyway because of the lag in statistics.

This was clearly just a bit of teasing after Mulgrew claimed that comedy and Irish exile dirges would save Balderstone and Kirkholt.

Let's see Adlard address:

1. Cricket's anti-jewish joke
2. Mulgrew plugging Cricket's desperate album in acceptance
3. Rochdale taking on eviction rights over water arrears
4. Paul Rowen being in charge when Rochdale slumped down list of local authorities and doubled its piss poor super output areas
5. Why he said "ward" when you said "area"; why he claimed you said all the SOAs were in Mulgrews ward; why he is defending the Lib Dem indefensible when last time we looked he was a Tory candidate, albeit it trailing in a sad third

Anonymous said...

Does the little sod know about libel?

Everybody Hates Chris said...

Here’s the quote that started it all, Chris. It’s your quote.
“Mulgrew's Balderstone & Kirkholt improved so much that it has made a National Top 100 Chart! Slipping from absolutely nowhere into the top 100 most deprived areas in Britain!”

So excuse me if I think you are referring to the whole ward and the fact that it has happened on Cllr Mulgrew’s watch. You very clearly are.

I know exactly what Super Output Areas and Enumeration Districts are. The boundaries of SOAs do not correspond with those of the recently redrawn wards (such as Balderstone & Kirkholt) and that’s why I was surprised that there was any “Top 100 Chart” compiled by anybody. That’s why I asked you for a source on the ward stats – because I suspected that they didn’t exist.

Here’s your reply “Try IMD2007 for latest - showing SOAs 5466, 5482, 5484 and 5568.” On checking, I found that only one of these – the first – was in Balderstone & Kirkholt. I also pointed out to you that this would not constitute a whole ward even if there were all in the same one.

You replied that there were 27 wards in Rochdale and 135 SOAs, an average of exactly 5. Presumably this was meant to lead people to thinking that the four you had quoted did make up an entire ward. In fact there are 20 wards in Rochdale, so the average is nearly 7.

You also said that the four SOAs were “17th, 15th, 11th, 47th in that order. So I could have said top-50.” Top 50 what, Chris? Again, you were still trying to con us into thinking that these were all in Cllr Mulgrew’s ward.

You had another go. Mulgrew apparently “promised to boost "his" ward” but “the area as I stated - has got worse with one or two of its SOAs into the top 50 WORST in the country”.

And again, you asked me if I was suggesting “that the whole of Dale's ward isn't in the top 50 of 30,000 super output areas in the country?”

I’m not suggesting it, Chris, I’m telling you. It isn’t. Nowhere near.

And now you have been revealed for the mendacious, little dweeb that you are, you now claim “I have not claimed Mulgrew represents all four desperate SOAs in Rochdale. Or even that his whole ward was in the top-50 least well served.” Oh yes you did. On several occasions.

You also say that you “have acknowledged above that Mulgrew was not at the helm for the 3-year period, ending in 2005 in which the deterioration occurred”. When? Where? I don’t think 2005 has ever been mentioned before.

So let me do so. These figures were published in 2007 but based on data collated in 2005. Even if they were collected on New Year’s Eve of that year, it would still be five months BEFORE, Mulgrew was elected. That’s how it works, Chris. I know you are having trouble with figures, but 2005 comes before 2006 (the year Mulgrew was first elected).

So who were the ward councillors in 2005 and prior to that, Chris? Pray tell.

Do you know a ward in Greater Manchester that has three of its SOAs in the most deprived 100 in the country? I do. Any idea which Greater Manchester authority has one third of all its areas in the worst 5% in the country? I do.

BTW. I am not defending Lib Dems in Rochdale, I am attacking you and your ‘methodology’ of producing grubby little half-truths and worse and then resorting to further distortion and abuse if anybody dares to challenge you.

Chris Paul said...

Listen Rob Adlard, you chump.

It's like this.

I claimed - correctly - that Dale's area had appeared anew in the top 100 areas experiencing multiple deprivation in the country.

I claimed - correctly - that Rochdale had double the number of areas in this top-100 (and indeed in the top-50) as the previous time the exercise was conducted. From two to four.

I claimed - correctly - that SOAs were smaller than wards i.e. that you were utterly wrong to call these ward stats. Deliberate, devious, ready to spring you anal traps. Spotted immediately.

I named (or numbered) the four SOAs - correctly - for the whole of Rochdale MBC but did not claim at any stage that they were all in Mulgrew's benighted ward. Again, that was you getting carried away with your humourless anality.

I pointed out that Mulgrew could be judged on the next round of these as I was amused that you were getting all anal on our asses about the geographical areas when it was the time frame that was more significant.

I was wrong about the 27 wards and therefore about the average number of SOAs in each ward. In fact these are based on the old boundaries anyway. I got the number 27 from a before and after boundary changes table but this included part wards - totalling 27 - and I did not notice that. Shame on me.

But really matey this is a waste of your time and mine.

I teased Dale. His area has got a worse report. Though he said it would get better. And I also pointed out the real issue with the joke ... long before your tedious essays and non sequitors.

Please use your own blog for anything over 100 words or so, unless it really is important. But do not, REPEAT DO NOT, ever lift stuff wholesale from my blog. As you have done before.

Everybody Hates Chris said...

"Mulgrew's Balderstone & Kirkholt improved so much that it has made a National Top 100 Chart! Slipping from absolutely nowhere into the top 100 most deprived areas in Britain!", said Chris Paul.

Balderstone & Kirkholt is a whole ward, not an output area. Mulgrew has been a councillor there since 2006, these figures are from 2005.

And where are the worst areas in Greater Manchester?

And do not, REPEAT DO NOT, ever accuse me of lifting stuff from your blog, wholesale or retail.

Chris Paul said...

You are Rob Adlard aren't you?

This strand is now closed. Another one will be along shortly. The myth of Cyril Smith or any Liberal post-war doing anything much to help Rochdale really does need nailed.