Sunday, May 24, 2009

Disgrace! Disgrace!: Dorries Demands Parity on Nepotism Claims

Disgrace! Disgrace! In a further affront to the dignity of Ms Nadine Dorries MP those well-known BNP supporters (not) The Barclay Brothers have maliciously failed to include Ms Dorries in an expose of MPs who heartily take the piss - in the time-honoured way - by employing under-qualified, and/or under-experienced, and/or under-skilled, and/or under-industrious family members.

As those confounded fascists (not) The Barclay Brothers have had their waffen storm trooper lawyers (not) pause for literally minutes from their McCarthyite Witch Hunting (not) of innocently troughing (not) MPs (not much longer) and issued a Take Down Order on Ms Dorries "blogsite" hampering her rapier riposte LOL will ride gallantly to the rescue.

Never mind Derek Conway and Malcolm Bruce and their damned wives! Nadine Dorries has of course already employed the following family members in her parliamentary piss-takery:

  • "Nadine's Mum" as location manager of the "Going To The Danger" Easter holidays location shoot featuring the shy retiring Nadine letting the world know that she was the most important MP by far mentioned and massively damaged in the otherwise virtually unpublished yet salacious, shocking and obscene work of latterly secret fiction by one D McBride;
  • "Nadine's Mum" as catering manager for the same series of vicious self-exposes, launchings of empty legals threats, putting of Mr Brown's private handwriting into the public domain and getting it analysed, sadly giving him a clean bill of health, plus the launch of various actionable outbound smearage;
  • "Nadine's Fairly Middling Middle Daughter" as the first actually paid intern in the history of the Conservative and Unionist Party;
  • "Nadine's Very Middling Eldest Daughter" as a spectacular surprise appointment to head mum's parliamentary team on the top scale, find a husband with a title and at least one moat to inherit, and of course feature as a prop in newspaper articles for the best part of a decade;
  • "Nadine's Ex-Husband" as house-sitter, child-sitter, dog-sitter for the "main home" in the beautiful Cotswold village of "Chiselling Expenses";
  • "Nadine's Ex-Husband" as house-sitter, child-sitter, dog-sitter for the "second home" in the Mid Narnia township of Woburn;
  • "Nadine's Other Rellies" as bit-part players in assorted myth making and mythomaniacal truth mangling.

  • To be frank and colourful, you Barclay Brothers, Ms Nadine Dorries MP's parliamentary career stretches back only four short years. Yet, yet, she has already nepotised more brilliantly than any other. On Nadine's behalf we hereby demand an immediate apology and an eight-page colour supplement expose-cum-interview, by Benedict Brogan himself, to include every damning revelation and every made-up family and career myth exploded.

    And you thought that Neil and Christine tore into the celebrity shamed-politician career like there was no tomorrow? Watch and learn. Watch and learn.


    Dick the Prick said...

    A little bit of respect should be afforded to Mizz Dorries I think Chris. As spectacular as idiocy goes I think she's made some advances to the grovelling sanctimony field. I think someone should give her a couple of words of advice with the addendum of 'and don't come back'.

    Chris Paul said...

    Seems firm but fair Dick, firm but fair.

    benchilltory said...

    i see greedy Mccartney is standing down, lets hope Goggins and blears follow.Shame someone honest like Ian Stewart is without a seat when all these local troughers exist

    Anonymous said...

    What's your view of Chaytor, Morley, McCartney, Blears's tax avoidance, Kaufmann' £8000 TV?

    tory boys never grow up said...

    Nadine is fair game - but you probably should leave her ex husband out of this - he is an MS sufferer who doesn't appear to have been treated very well at all.

    What i find funny is Nadine's past attackes on travellers who just happen to be passing through her constituency - a bit like Nadine really.

    Dick the Prick said...

    Johnson's calling for a referendum on PR now. FFS - way to treat the people with contempt - it's not us (or them, to be fair to Postie Pat) - IT'S THE SYSTEM!! Cer cer cer cer Cockhead.

    12 years ago - fine - your mandate, majority, hell - even a policy with some ability to state as principled. Now, now? Are you freekin' kidding? And way to give succour to the BNP.

    They're all bloody idiots.

    Anonymous said...

    And I see that two old friends of ours are also stepping down at the next electionChrist! At this rate, there will be no politicians left to Photoshop.

    Dick the Prick said...

    Lakelander - yup, that's a shame. Now when will the cops do their job?

    Simpering War Criminal said...

    You have to admit the Tories do mad-as-a-badger better than any other party. Cameron is going to spoil that soooooo much.

    Dick the Prick said...

    Simpering - I was at an local government annual council last week. I think the Lib Dems can get a WTF are you on about response at lightening speed. They hate each other! Most odd, most odd.

    Cammo ain't gonna do shite except turf out the egregious troughers.