The best we can do for now is to publish this appeal in full. If anyone can help please contact the website direct. Let's be clear:
1. Tom Cruise has no messianic thoughts and whether he is the one true Christ or not he has been renounced by Scientologist HQ.
2. There was no long-winded hiatus during which Scientologists pretended L Ron Hubbard was alive when he had already died of deep satisfaction and money bags achievement.
3. Libdemologists are yet to announce who they will put up as looky likey to Mr "Rusty" Cruise*.
* Father Rusty Cruz married my friends Barry and Marion in Manila. This was of course back in the day of Cardinal Sin.