Akehurst: Seeing Red as Farmers' Market Hits Roof

Don't like to encourage Akehurst's Alter Ego, one bursting ego can be quite enough, but given recent cross party concern about a farmer's lot it is cheering to see Luke linking to the uplifting story of farmers whose fortunes are literally high as a kite. Thanks, say commentators, to British input on the ground. Teach a man to fish and all that.

But there's more. Though Luke displays a captured propaganda sheet (left) that Hackney right wingers were planning to put in place of the more uplifting story (right) from the horticultural frontline. Growing and arranging flowers has become the watchword for seething machismo and bitter local rivalries. Monsanto are said to have patents pending but will not be serving this produce in the staff canteen.

BUT SERIOUSLY: It is time we started buying the whole crop as futures - they don't even have to grow it - and also buying something useful that they actually do grow on the same fields. Bit like set aside.