Thursday, August 02, 2007

Bicycling: One of Our Bicycles is Missing 1


Dear Boris Piffle Johnson's bicycle is missing. Stolen from a Fort Knoxian mooring by an insolent scallywag. This sort of thing can happen to the best of us and the police are sanguine:

Up here in Manchester's leafy suburbs we had a reverse bike burglary when crack-addled crooks broke in, stormed upstairs shouting, stormed downstairs muttering 'wrong house', nicked some useless stuff (most of which they dropped on the way out), and traded up from a bike to a getaway car.

They left the bike in the drive. The police told us to keep it and they'd be in touch if it were claimed. We did and they haven't been. It does get used every now and then. Not bad.

Perhaps someone round the corner from you has lost their Beamer and gained a silver-grey Marin Sausalito?

Like the one this young scallywag is pushing furtively past the paps.

4 comments:

jailhouselawyer said...

This has to go down as the crime of the century...

Chris Paul said...

Yes, doesn't he whine about it? He thinks there are thieves on London streets. What an eye opener.

jailhouselawyer said...

Might I suggest that he looks in Tim Montgomerie's bicycle shed because he had a bike nicked awhile ago and he would have had to replace it?

Anonymous said...

Well I have to say Chris that this blog and your comment on Boris Johnson's blog is a missed opportunity:

"Up here in Manchester's leafy suburbs we had a reverse bike burglary when crack-addled crooks broke in, stormed upstairs, stormed downstairs, nicked some useless stuff (most of which they dropped on the way out), and traded up from a bike to a getaway car. They left the bike. The police told us to keep it and they'd be in touch if it were claimed. We did and they haven't been. It does get used every now and then. Not bad.

Perhaps someone round the corner from you has lost their Beamer and gained a silver-grey Marin Sausalito?"

What about "Tough on crime, tough on the causes of crime?" Is that no longer the NuLab mantra? Or is it just piffle?

I notice that Iain Dale has not blogged on this. I wonder why?