Monday, December 29, 2008

Tory Totty Homewreckers: Pauvres Cons Misrepresented by NOTW

Where's poor Norma? Jamie Lyons of the News of the World blog team published some tosh which, natually enough, Mark Pack at Lib Dem Voice linked to and re-published rather smugly. This suggested that ipsos MORI had discovered that both Tory Women and Tory Men were busily stopping pretty Tory laydeez making progress up their slippery pole.

Tim Montgomerie wasn't so sure and blogged his doubts immediately and then did the research and confirmed those doubts. Not saying that the NOTW is completely wrong mind, but they have got some of it wrong.

They should have talked to Tim's one time favourite Tory MP on the distaff. That was the self-effacing and rather shy Mad Nad Dorries. She knows what goes on in the poisoned minds of the Tory men and women she meets. Particularly once she got her second, or was it third?, divorce through that is:

It never ceases to amaze me how many women suddenly fall madly in love with their husbands as I am taken over to be introduced.
They may not have held their husbands hand for weeks, but will be seized by a sudden urge to hang on to his arm, hold his hand and brush back the imaginary stray hairs from his almost bald head as they talk to me.
Her body language yells through an imaginary loud hailer ‘step away from the husband, he’s mine’!
I want to say stop, don’t worry, he has a pot belly, bad breath and a face only his mother and apparently you could love. You really aren’t in any danger of me or any other single woman running off with your clinically obese husband, he really is all yours.
But of course… I don’t.
It’s enough to see the sudden involuntary arch of his eyebrows as he laps up attention from the wife who forgot who he was until five minutes ago.
I never spend too long talking to couples, it's never that comfortable - but as I walk away I always want to turn around and say, "you should fall asleep holding his hand every single night. You should hold his hand often, every single day, because you're very very lucky".
But of course….. I don’t. I walk away and over to the next couple....

She's back on the loose again. Lock up your sons and nephews!


Dick the Prick said...

geez Chris - please let this be a low water mark. Have you ever split up with anyone lad?

Dr Feeley-Goode said...

Chris Paul, why do you bother? Nobody is reading your sad, incomprehensibly parochial blog. I've only dropped by to tell you that you are a mug of the first order. Now catch a bus to obscurity why don't you?

Chris Paul said...

Cheers both

Anonymous said...

Don't suppose Chris has ever split up with anyone after very dishonestly parading her current and past relationships in the papers and on her blog and even making a feature of her family values. Hardly a cross in the no publicity box from Nadine.

Though really it must be said that LOL has been ahead of the world in relaying the reality of the denied Tim-Nads hook up, and certainly ahead of the pack in announcing the end of the line for that nonsense.