Wednesday, April 22, 2009

Paul Rowen at PMQs: Cyril Smith Has Sky Hook Ready For Nose Job



Meanwhile also watching the goggle box from Radio Rentals Redifusion, bought for 12 shillings and six pence when they stopped supporting that model back in '68 a gift from a friend in high places, back at the Emma Street "friends of Cyril" HQ, at the deep dark heart of darkest Rochdale, a pyjama'ed Sir Cyril Smith was nochalently picking his whopping great dentures with a discarded T-Bone, watching proceedings intently, and poised with a telematic remote control ... "If worst should happen".

Ready to hook Paul Rowen MP out of the chamber by the nose if he dared to again take Dave Hen's advice and mention the new fangled "blog" publication Labour of Love ... saying anything "untrue" about hisself, beloved enforcer Norman, blessed Cambridge House, or that dratted scapegoat Stefan Kiszko.

It must have been a near thing when the Muppet of Deeplish went with Asbestos in Schools instead. But when the pair "spat and shook" on the deal it was the complete ban on meddling with bloggers that were discussed. Fair's fair.

"Repeat after me!", croaked Sir Cyril Smith with a grin on his gums, "Asbestos is safe; Asbestos is great; Asbestos is the magic mineral; M'jammies are made from the stuff; M' pies n'all; Tha didn't have to work in the Killing Fields; And if tha've got the magic mineral riddling tha school, tha should count tha chuffing blessings! Like finding a greasy green bacon rind in Back Passage No 2, and ahead of the 'roaches and rats n'all. Mmmmmm."

[satire]And then in a thought, not really suitable for blogging Cyril added, under his subconscious breath, but with initial capitals throughout for emphasis: "Knickers Down, Over M' Knee, When I Get Tha Home, I'll Give Tha 'What For?' Young Rowen M' Ladio."[/satire]

SERIOUSLY THOUGH: The misdemeanours of Sir Cyril are no laughing matter. If any of you laughed you should be bloody ashamed of yourself.

FOOTNOTE Thu 08:15: Very sorry. Radio Rental gag was very, very wrong. Wrong company, wrong price completely. Amended.

6 comments:

Rochdale Rapper said...

12/6 Radio Rentals?

When Redifusion left Rochdale did the brown envelopes to Emma Street stop?

Or did they stop after Cyril's perfidy against his party boss (and Redifusion director) Jezzer Thorpe during the Norman Scott affair?
(Rinkagate not the old editor of the Rochdale Obscurer).

Cyril's shares in Turner Newall will have paid him dividends in the profitable but deadly products sold to Britain's schools and hostels.

With his testicle squeezing and buttock slapping hands plus his asbestos share dividend grasping - Cyril Smith has made being young in Rochdale a hazardous activity.

Only defiant and unrepentant Cyril Smith would have the bare faced cheek to be associated with local charities like Rochdale Childer.

Chris Paul said...

Gosh gosh gosh

Think of the general reader dear anonymous 18:28:

12/6 Radio Rentals?

When Redifusion left Rochdale did the brown envelopes to Emma Street stop?
Oh dear. Apparently Cyril DID NOT get his TV from the alleged company (Radio Rentals) by parting with 12s 6d of his own money. There was something about this other company mentioned ... being Redifusion.

Or did they stop after Cyril's perfidy against his party boss (and Redifusion director) Jezzer Thorpe during the Norman Scott affair?
(Rinkagate not the old editor of the Rochdale Obscurer).
I believe this is some reference to the perfidious rumour machine that Cyril's dark heart of the darkest borough in Emma Street may have benefited through a connection with Sir Jeremy Thorpe (another famous knightly Libdemologist) from a very special price for sticking Redifusion tellies in every corporation villa and deck access maisonette.

(Obviously a lower price? - litigation Ed)

And that Norman Scott reference? Well dear general reader there are two Norman Scotts of interest. The Liberal-connected one who was the proprietor of the Rochdale Observer, and the Liberal-connected one whose dog Rinka took a fatal bullet for the team, on Bodmin Moor, near Brown Willy (which is a big hill in Cornwall, you muppets) or thereabouts.

Cyril's shares in Turner Newall will have paid him dividends in the profitable but deadly products sold to Britain's schools and hostels.This being a reference to the fact that bastard Cyril bought a tranche of bastard shares in the bastard asbestos company at a very good bastard price, he said giving the impression that he was out for a sporting Stock Market profit, though he later claimed for the purer than pure reason of being able to speak of the AGM of the huge killer company.

Bigger than today's Vodaphone in terms of market capitalisation. Sources said they would have let him speak without owning all those shares ... And other dark thoughts are also expressed.

With his testicle squeezing and buttock slapping hands plus his asbestos share dividend grasping - Cyril Smith has made being young in Rochdale a hazardous activity.This being a reference to poor Cyril Smith's arrest, in 1968 I think it was, over those allegations of a systematic abuse of power in his role as a Trustee over Cambridge House, a lodging for young "working boys", involving e.g. smacking and groping, vulnerable boys down from Scotland to ply their trade at Whipp and Bourne (which is the name of a genuine and still trading local company, lest anyone think this is some vile innuendo).

The testicle squeezing etc being an indication of the allegations. From an abused member of the next generation of child sex botherers. Blubbing Cyril in tears. Begging for leniency. Blub, blubber, blubbery blub ... eventually but then suddenly, and unsatisfactorily for alleged victims all, getting leniency. Though the allegations and the signed affidavits didn't disappear as quickly as the formal charges.

Only defiant and unrepentant Cyril Smith would have the bare faced cheek to be associated with local charities like Rochdale Childer.Ouch! Wouldn't it be a good thing if any and all accusations, allegations, evidence and assorted reports were brought forward speedily? Far better that than that the flood gates of adverse information open instead a few days after Cyril's funeral. When the man has no chance to explain himself.

Give Cyril the chance to clear his name! Get your allegations and evidence in, soon as.

Rochdale Rapper said...

Are these the allegations about Cyril Smith and historic sex abuse that Paul Rowen say he and Cyril would sue if the claims on the t'internet were ever printed?

They have been printed.

Lets start with the allegations that were published in May and June 1979 by Rochdale's Alternative Paper and Private Eye.

Cyril NEVER sued.

The printed published allegations stand.

Chris Paul said...

You know, I think you're right Rochdale Rapper. There were LOL and Hen eyeball-to-eyeball and the other chap blinked.

Seems to me - and especially after TWO (count 'em!) particularly deep throat calls from the darkest heart of darkest Lib Dem Rochdale last evening I'd say this "get Labour bloggers" is a pre-emptive strike in case many, many other dark stories from darkest Lib Dem (and indeed Labour) histories (new and old) in this dark township begin to see the light.

They're right about those! Most of them haven't been printed or published. Because we are responsible we don't print "untrue" allegations about wretched Cyril Smith, wretched Paul Rowen, and especially wretched Dave Hen.

I'm Spartacus said...

"Noble Locks" Rowen has been listening too much to Dave Hennigan. Is that egg on face?

The balls-out attack claiming that "labour members blogging" against him, diddy DaveH and Spanker Cyril has retreated back into the ball sack - leaving the one mention of it on Rochdale Online- an old shrivelled dick that no-one takes much notice of.

Perhaps the reverse smear from the Rowan camp is something very clever. Is Paul allowing Dave to actually briefing against him?

Is Dave a bit RAW?

Or have those boys at Drake Street Lib Dem HQ been watching too many Kirk Douglas/Tony Curtis sweaty leather hot pant epics?

Who is RAW?

Will Dave stand up and admit that he is RAW?

Or is Malcolm Journeaux RAW?

Chris Paul said...

Malcolm Porn-O is born again cock rocker, propagandist and mucky snapper Jour's official nickname on this blog.

Please observe local customs.

And have you Rochdale window shoppers not noticed an option appraisal provided gratis for sweaty Paul and grouchy Hen? Need to tweet that I guess.