NW Euro Elections: Partial Result For Rochdale MBC

rochdale mbc result.
Con 8909

Labour 8468

Lib Dem 8299

UKIP 7141

BNP 4905

Thanks to anonymous for posting this information half an hour ago. Be interested to know what the total of the other seven lists and the soloist was.

If the eight NW seats were shared on the basis of these RMBC shares we'd get 2-2-2-1-1 with that last one being BNP. Fortunately this is the poorly run Lib Dem shambles that is Rochdale and there have previously been signs of the BNP doing well where the Lib Dems hold sway.

Something to do with nurturing of misery, cynicism and apolitica.

Euro Turnout Figures: North West England = 31.9%

Finally heading off to the Town Hall to gurn at Griffin. Let's hope Hazel's nonsense of Wednesday did not hand this man a boost sufficient to see his jackboots in the corridors of Strasbourg.

The received wisdom would be that a turn out this low would favour the BNP with their allegedly committed cohorts of confused adherents. However, there was quite a range of protest and anti-EU options. And the "voter strike" and "spoilt ballot" ideas also had traction that would have carved off some of the 2004 BNP dabblers.

The overall figure is more than 10% before the Europe-wide figure of more than 43%. The particular version of PR we're using is a bit of a turn off, and also unlike STV a gift to loons of all conceivable flavours.

Here finally are those Greater Manchester figures:

The turnout in the European elections in north west England was 31.9% (40.6% in 2004)

The highest turnout was in South Lakeland in Cumbria with 49.9%
The lowest 21.56% in Knowsley, Merseyside.

Counting takes place this Sunday, with the regional result and seat allocation being declared at Manchester Town Hall, in two to three hours time.

Other turnout figures:

Bolton 30.6%
Bury 34.2%
Manchester 27.0%
Oldham 29.8%
Rochdale 28.5%
Salford 27.4%
Stockport 33.2%
Tameside 30.4%
Trafford 34.1%
Wigan 27.0%

Liverpool 24.1%

Regional turnout boosted by County Council elections in Lancashire and Cumbria.

In Lancashire County Council election, the election turnout was 38%. This was the area where, in 2004, BNP polled the highest in the region. In the 2004 Euros the BNP received 7.9% in Lancashire compared to 6.4% in the North West as a whole.

EXCLUSIVE Daylight Robbery: Rowen's Lib Dems Rob Tax

Every time PR Paul Rowen MP and his tax-payer salaried cronies cobble together one of their hocus pocus "Focus" or cock and bull un-badged "XY News" sheets with an "advertisement" for surgery times you'd think they'd include free and gratis, the tax payer is actually taking a big hit. Let me explain.

While this example from Kingsway, Rochdale claims to be "Free" (1) PR Paul Rowen is in fact robbing the tax payer of £700 per edition to pay the local Lib Dems to produce this and the equivalents in other wards. Producing heavily partisan publicity material on the taxpayer is strictly banned. And the pretence of an "advertisement" is just that. Pretending to advertise something that should be there anyway. Just to get the taxpayer to pay for party propaganda.

And this Kingsway News is nothing if not party political propaganda. The main story (2) begins with a pseudo Masonic "up and up" headline and concludes with a something and nothing story (3) about where a political rival lives, and at its heart is the big lie (4). Money coming largely from the Labour Government's exciting regeneration and education and transport and housing programmes is claimed as if it is a Lib Dem bounty. It's not.

By the look of it pretty much all the monies identified in the "5 reasons to celebrate" box alongside the story is YOUR MONEY, taxpayers' money, coming from the Labour Government. Even though the area is sorrily misrepresented by Lib Dem clown PR Paul. It's Labour delivering for the people of Rochdale, not the ridiculous expenses fiddler PR Paul Rowen.

Clearly, when it comes to the exact street where someone lives (3) these scallywags are anal and hair-splitting fetishists. However when they refer to "our area" in the headline they actually mean the whole of Rochdale! I wonder how much of the £1 Billion identified - of your money, via Labour ideas and programmes, is going to the "our area" meaning Kingsway?

And given their anal interests, their sordid fetish in localism where can they be printing their leaflet? It's gotta be somewhere local now hasn't it? Well, if you call Derby local it is. The dishonest Rochdale Lib Dems have given the work to Harmsworth Printing Limited, Northcliffe House, Derby, DE1 2DW. Aren't there any printers in Rochdale? Or Greater Manchester? For such an anal, local-fetish political party?

Apparently not. Though whereas John Leech MP and his "John Bull Set" calling themselves the Withington Printing Society (unicorporated, unaccountable) were until recently sticking their initials on complex, high quality, four-colour, lithographic work as if it had been printed on their John Bull Set, here we have a professional printer in faraway Derby sticking their names on something showing clear signs of amateurish paste up.

Finally, of course, the coup de grace (6), the death blow to PR Paul Rowen's claims of expenses honesty. This dishonest party political leaflet has been produced - in Derby - using £700 of taxpayers money through the disgraceful ruse of an advert for information that should be on every leaflet these clowns produce. Free and gratis.

For this price PR Paul could have taken a far more effective advert - around twice the size - probably a BOGOF allowing both editions of the Rochdale Observer, certainly the more popular one, getting their online and freesheet titles thrown in to boot. If that is the completely free listings in such papers are insufficient to provide the information in a satisfactory way.

Does this snide, cheating, rip off PR Paul Rowen advertising actually work? To judge from the lack of interest in the clown's most recent surgery at Morrisons people don't want to speak to him. Is this because he's a useless money-grubbing self-serving toad? Or because the stench of expenses-gate is now wafting out from Drake Street? Putting PR Paul Rowen among the worst not the best of the political cheats?

The Drake Street offices themselves, like the tax-funded propaganda, the tax-funded "political agents", and the tax funded hoarding at Spotland, being yet another example of PR Paul lining the pockets of the local Lib dems and hence his own campaigning funds by one contrivance after another. Rent paid to the party, who pay a firm controlled by senior party figures, who speedily donate the money back to the party, who already trousered half the tax-payer cash on the way through?

There should be a law against it, and there probably is. Let's have the money returned to the people for all these scams and torturous twistings of the letter and spirit of the laws. Lets see PR Paul Rowen recalled in a by-election. And let's see Rochdale people telling the money-grubbing fraud to sling his hook. And take his sly band of political hacks with him.

They've had a million off us already. Enough is enough. You're NOT good value". Give the money back you petty pilfering waste of space. And shut the door on your way out.

Manchester Labour: Campaigning Culture One Hundred Percent

Spent the morning and early afternoon at a Manchester Labour train-in and planning day. Very good to see that, despite the various completed, ongoing and expected train wrecks, the spirit is still strong with a near 100% turnout from the invited councillors, candidates, coordinators and campaigners. Some excellent work ensued, interspersed with just a little rather ridiculous blagging from one or two rather idle individuals.

Opinions vary on what should happen and what will happen next on the Westminster Horizon, and even on how bad the EuroThrashing will be around midnight tomorrow. Will it be third time lucky on the annual October General Election sweep? With Brown at the helm? Or overboard? Or will the impatience in some quarters "to get it over with" or "to not risk it getting even worse" be surmounted by the "things can only get better' DNA of the pre-triangulation, pre-Project old school? Interesting times.

I've also now got more detailed turnout figures for the Euro. Will post them shortly. Inevitably lower than in 2004, when we had hotly contested Metropolitan all-outs in Manchester and Liverpool, but could well be enough, along with the wide range of non-fascist protest options to confound the BNP.

Caroline Flint MP: Does My Bandwidth Look Big In This?

This is the question from Caroline Flint's homepage just now. Window dressing my arse. Caroline Flint is a nightmare. Whatever you think about Brown ... Blears is a nightmare. Purnell is a nightmare. Flint is a nightmare. They have damaged our Party and they should all be very ashamed of themselves.

I've seen it written that Blears' timing was so deliberately damaging that she should be kicked out ... may have even won Nick Griffin an MEP seat by depressing our turnout.

Hoon should not get Commissioner job. "Plans change mate" he should be told. McNulty is a disgrace. Should be barred from standing again. Smith begins to look relatively good. And Hutton too. Half the Progress crew should be renamed "Regress". Two cheers to the other half for rising above rattle rattling big baby nonsense.

Andy Burnham and Ed Miliband were the only Progress MPs who mentioned Gordon Brown in a positive way at the Conference Putsch Wake/Rally back in September. Flint almost literally spat his name out. Purnell bumbled and mumbled. I've dusted off my notes. More soon.

Breaking News: Hoon Ian Gibson MP Throws Toys = By-Election

Ian Gibson MP is apparently throwing his toys at the failure of Hazel's Hotmail Plot and resigning with immediate, apparently causing a by-election in Norwich.

UPDATE 16:08: Michael White suggests Gibson will stand as Independent. Makes it far less of a problem for Brown if that's correct.

UPDATE 16:11: Ian Gibson - live on BBC News - doesn't mention this Whitean standing as an Independent idea. Or did BBC leave too soon?

Breaking News: Right Hoon Geoff Hoon "Stands Down"!

Hurrah! Tweet Sky News. Again hurrah! BBC haven't got it yet. 15:31 they catch up.

Basic Instinct: Siobhan McDonagh MP, Batty Bunny Boiler

Further to our Morning Has Broken / Broken Record post ... One of Hazel's co-conspiracists Siobhan McDonagh MP (right) is live and direct on BBC News Channel claiming that some of the Cabinet Ministers who have today maintained a view contrary to the Blearsky Hotmail Eight, or indeed come to their senses after flirting with their self-indulgence, and said clearly they back Gordon Brown and getting on with the business of governing are in fact fibbing.

What a fecking idiot this woman is! How very dare she contradict her colleagues and comrades in this way? This so-called coup has been the worst of all possible worlds. It has damaged Labour and possibly cost us the odd county council and/or MEP, and it ain't going to effect any change anyway. It is going to fizzle and die as LOL predicted last night. I'm glad to see that.

MORNING HAS BROKEN: Cameron and Clegg Broken Record

God, Cameron's up himself this morning. And Clegg too. Holding up a series of about-to-be-sacked Ministers jumping before they were pushed as a collapse of authority is nonsense. Smith was toast. Blears was toast. Purnell was very likely toast too. And Labour List 2.0 are probably toast now too.

Self-indulgent student's union crapulence reporting on the same.

Dale is saying THEY (Labour List) say Brown Must Go on the basis of the above link which is an Alex Smith post not a "Labour List" post. All they (or to be clear Alex Smith, again) are doing this morning is carelessly reporting the PH Panel ... including Potty Toynbee and Clunky Clarkey think he should go.

There are lots of Tory and Lib Dem sleaze stories to come I think. Labour have been done to death, almost. But some Tory stories are in reserve, or failing Telegraph due diligence will come out in July. The Lib Dem ones will be of a different type I reckon. Tax payers money used as campaign war chests will be the pattern.

We've already had examples with PR Paul Rowen of course.

Office rented from party rented from Cyril Smith and the sleazy old guard. Donations like boomerangs feeding the tax money back. Subsidy for campaign leaflets. Subsidy for hoardings. And political staff paid for by the taxpayer. Disgraceful. There'll be more of that sort of thing when we see the Lib Dem small print.

A General Election in a hurry would spoil some of this "discovery" process. No small wonder they're eager beavers. Like Purnell and Blears in a sense. And Cam isn't filling the posts vacated by his moat-dredgers and duck-housers and missing main-homers until October anyway. He's just making inevitable calls for a General Election.

The big question for today: can Hopi Sen keep Iain Dale twaddle in proportion.

Here's a Link to Iain's Announcement

PHONE
If you want to appear live on the programme call 01243 556161. Obviously we can only take one call at a time so you may have to wait a bit, but don’t give up!

EMAIL talk@playradiouk.com

SKYPE
Dial up play.radio.uk . We can take Skype calls, and also Skye chat messages.

TWITTER

You can use my twitter name @iaindale, and it will appear on my Tweetdeck app, or you can use the hashtag #electionstudio. The hashtag is probably best.

MEANWHILE: Whatever Iain may say, his Reid story is NOT stood up straight. Wobbly at best. But I'm pleased to have got Purnell early. Also tweeted here. He was going to be pushed I think, so he has jumped. The Telegraph may tuck in at this point.

BREAKING WIND: Clegg on Bristol. Yeuch! Holding Liverpool up as an exemplar. Terrible result for Labour in Bristol it must be said. But this is a protest. Not an endorsement of the Lib Dems who WERE PANTS last time they took control, briefly.

UPDATE 11:49: Tweaked a bit round the Labour List links. John Hutton MP is rather impressive in his move at this stage. He's a Blairite. But he is not a self-indulgent tosser like Purnell.

Iain Dale Is Up Himself: But, LOL Fingered James Purnell

Iain Dale is up himself in a big way. That's why we love him. That's why Hazel Blears has co-opted Iain to her little conspiracy. And, indeed, that's why he has been so keen to be co-opted by his little chipmunk. Even co-opted up silly side tracks.

And, that's why he writes the headline:

Evening Standard: Dale Was Right About Reid and Brown

When in fact they only said:

A No 10 source confirmed that Mr Reid and Mr Brown had met but said it was “rubbish” to say that they had discussed the leadership. Mr Reid dismissed reports of the alleged conversation as “inaccurate”.

Plus some further self-justificatory tail/tale chasing. Like my deceased cat Wiley in the bath used to do. Didn't get her anywhere. But no declaration of "Iain Woz Right". This is still not a stood up story Iain.

Here's my open letter to you:

Dear Iain

After your Tom Watson MP smears, judged to be defamatory and subject of substantial damages, we have to wonder about anything, particularly unattributed briefings, that you report.

Post McBride, yourself and Guido were all over the lobby, berating them for not outing the inaccurate spinners they live off. But you're in the same loop.

There may be something to it or not. It may be half right. And half wrong. Or some other proportions. And then there is the question of the story's news value. Reid = not a Brown supporter! Shock horror.

I don't understand why Reid would be asked to take this particular job, again. He's leaving at the General Election. There isn't anything much in it for him at this point in his career. Just grief. Perhaps that's the rather significant part of the story that ain't necessarily so?

Reid's not a Brown fan, is well known. And he's a very skilled political operator. Very good attention to detail I've noticed. In personal encounters with him. But it's hard-to-impossible to conceive of a pitch to John Reid to get him back into cabinet at this point. Or of a circumstance in which Gordon Brown, not necessarily a Reid fan, would attempt such a thing.

The story - let's suppose it's from Hazel Blears for example - is not stood up. It may well be imperfectly sourced from someone with an axe to grind, like Hazel, inaccurately and/or imprecisely told by Iain I'd guess, and a still uncorroborated half story when push comes to shove.

If the LES has THREE sources as Iain suggests, being his - via him - and two others, I'm worried. John Reid and Gordon Brown were at the meeting. Others? Not a lot I'd have thought. Anyone at all? Wouldn't be wise. Perhaps, people are getting tired just now. The summer recess is here, very soon. But, we can be sure ... Gordon hasn't been blagging anything like this about would be my guess.

So, John Reid is the only obvious primary source. Whoever he's shared with are secondary sources. Perhaps you could get a couple at a stroke via a three-way conversation. And whoever they've shared with. Way down the chinese whispers on this. But that's still just one source really. Sorry.

Mischief is afoot. Your source Iain cannot help but being part of that. And you certainly ain't going to be calling a halt to this mischief.

It's not like your mate Derek Conway having it away with a million, or Nadine Dorries being an idiot, this is Hazel and her crew doing student's union politics writ big.

BY THE WAY: I fingered Purnell as a flight risk a while ago (36 hours ago) when asked about potential resignations from Flint and Burnham. I think Flint probably will go, though Crick (tonight on Newsnight) has her down for a big promotion. I hope Burnham won't, he's proper Labour, but he might, Hazel did. But I volunteered Mr Purnell (above from Beau Bo D'Or) as more likely to walk.

Purnell's a bit to a lot vulnerable I think on trousergate. Others may try to convince me otherwise over the next 48 hours. I'll probably wait for that to play out. But an early election footing would suit him from that POV I'd say.

All the best

Polls Close In Four Minutes: What's Been Happening?

Been a funny old day. The first election day for a very long time when I've had so little personal involvement. Voted a couple of weeks ago. Did some voter iD work, leaflet drops, and some eve of poll type things. But not much today. Beetling around, taking things in is about all.

But today I've been on different vital missions. Couple of Diary stories ticking away. Some work work. Trying to sell a ship. That's a long story. Senior Management Team of a Charity to pull apart, dust down and put back together again.

More prosaically ... Fixed the power steering on the Volvo. Changed a popped lightbulb. Tried to move, dropped and smithereened another that was a little too hot. Ouch. Adjusted a BMX bike. Pondered tearing up and re-laying some crazy paving. Cups of tea here and there, dotted about. Must use up this Quality Save batch. Yeuch!

Some if not all of which activity would normally have been shelved for an election. Even in the 1999 (was it?) Euro Election, isolated a month after some "real" elections as I recall, I did far more in the run up and on the day. Though that was flat too. And in 2004 it was 15-hour days all through, being in parallel with the Manchester all-out.

The turn out could be very depressed indeed in areas with no County Council elections, in other words many Labour cities and towns. Hard to tell isn't it. This isn't an all-postal, but there are a lot of postals out there. Could be an overlooked factor if you ask me.

Unless the whipped up righteous indignation of the likes of Kelvin Sleazeball Mackenzie gets the walk up vote out? And unless their local "sleaze bag MP" is a Tory that's not so good for the Labour Party Euro vote either.

Certainly there were no great queues or crowds at any Polling Station I passed today. One unusually in a school that was fully open for business. Another in a steel site office in an obscure suburban back street. Yet another at a scruffy drinking club. The sign above was a day or two ago and out in deepest Derbyshire. Where an extraordinarily successful Labour authority is under threat.

Took attack dogs Blears*, McBride, and Hennigan to Heaton Park early afternoon for their constitutional. Having to share the space with lots of Oasis-y punters and worrying whether those who Be Here Now had already been to vote ... Off later for daughter's ice skating coaching with Donna. She used to teach me too. These days she also does a good few Dancing On Ice celebs, including an ever-reducing Nolan sister.

Different territory to Bury and Crumpsall borders certainly, down Altrincham way. Polling stations here and there. But remarkably few street posters. Very depressed level of political activity. Back in 2004 the place had significance. There was a bit of a run in with Jean Marie Le Pen and Nicholas John Griffin at the Cresta Hotel. My Labour Against the BNP banner sat down in the road and got a bit stretched by the advancing Griff-Pen Limo and their arsey police and thug bodyguard.

Then again some big boys tipped some food waste bins all over their meinkamphwagen. And someone had it away with their windscreen wiper. Here's their "hanging" poster on the Oldham Road, near candidate Derek Adams' condemned wreck of a pub. In between lies a proper hoarding. The message? Confused.com is what.


Home and have just completed a YouGov online survey, related to these Euros and with some interesting nay strange questions within. And a couple of "Prize Draw" arrangements. One for £1,000! Trousered 50p cash money for my efforts on another! Not quite minimum wage, but hey ho. And a chance to win £25 on the low rent one.

If you sign up now at the link you might be able to take part too.

Son (13) is still not home from school. Little rascal. Left a message at 5:30 pm saying he was at the cinema and would be home no later than ... one hour ago. Grrrrr. It was 8:00 pm before we checked the ansaphone. Someone call social services.

Following that I did a bit of a "TV Prep" with an associate, headed for Shepherd's Bush later, and then read the Guardian's Stratton-Wintour-Hencke Hazel "Leona Blearsky" Blears Plot report. Seems the eight, count 'em, plotters have been ducking and diving about for a month or so. In revolutionary cells of twos and threes.

Never all alone in the same room at once. That kind of thing.

Pathetic in the extreme. They're all mad I tell you. And making a big song and dance about having no Campaign group folk in their number. As if these assorted bitter and twisted wing nuts were actual keeping the actually rather sensible "usual suspects" out of the Blearsy "Hotmail" Plot! The Guardianistas are just as bad. Thick as thieves with the plotters.

There's a fair chance it'll fizzle and die this one. The Telegraph could nail it and piss on the Guardian's chips with one of the big Tory stories they're sitting on. Or even take out one or two of the plotters. Or twist the knife in HB.

Anyone like a guess as to the eight plotter's names? Perhaps Flint, Chaytor, Morley, Gibson, Blears, Stringer, Prentice, and that other one. George is it?

* "Draper" who is a girl attack dog, has been renamed "Blears".

Scatty Guardian Editorials: Are They Letting Polly Pen Them?

In the Guardian we have a second "utter rubbish" editorial in two days, viz. Gordon's Toast answered but an hour ago by Madeleine Bunting who has a far more coherent case for Brown staying.

The last thing the Labour Party need just now is a distracting leadership contest. There is a world economy to be rescued. And a constitutional reform process to be managed. Putting anything else ahead of these things is self-indulgent crap and would be unforgiveable. Presumably as the elected Deputy Harriet Harman would have the caretaker job, until there was a contest, if Gordon did go?

Unless she stood aside in favour of runner-up Alan Johnson. Which seems very unlikely indeed. Unless there were a Beckett-esque understanding that the caretaker would not stand for the eventual vacancy. But we digress. Back to political reality. There is a nation-wide election coming up. It is tomorrow.

Yesterday the Guardian Editorial echoed SDP Polly Toynbee - Jonathan Freedland said Green - in calling for a vote for The Yellow Libdemologists, ignorant or careless enough to suggest that more than one party can be backed: "A PR election means people can back more than one party, and many progressives will cheer if the Greens do well." Are they actually letting PT write editorials?!

Meanwhile it seems that the Postal Voting stationery is again setting pulses racing. The PV ballot is so cumbersome and in such big print that some voters are apparently tearing off only the fold with their cross on it before sticking it in the envelope and sending it in. The only party for whom this process generates a valid vote - with the official mark as well as the cross - is the BNP.

Blackburn Labour think they are on to it. It's hard to see how the Returning Officer can allow any disembodied votes at all to stand, but if they do it can only be the top section, given the way the ballots were printed.

Let's hope that there is a good deal more than 200 votes - the Blackburn Labour estimated potential advantage to the fascists of this preferential ballot spoiling, which implies there will be up to 3,000 so spoilt altogether - between the loathsome Nick Griffin and his jackboots getting a pass for the corridors of power. Proportional Representation is all very well. But polling say 8% and getting a seat, though 92% of the people reject you, is surely one PR madness too far?

The NW ballot papers were also of course rather unusual in including the definite article on The Green Party and The Labour Party in the alpabeticising, though other parties managed to cotton on to this intention to buck the standard protocols. Also good to see that such was the popularity of the Jury Team concept in our region that they didn't even fill their slate of eight on the basis of self-nomination. They managed six.

Bring Back Derek!: Labour List to Recreational Fragging?

Under Derek Draper Labour List would pick fights with the big beasts of the right-wing blogosphere and stay 90% on message but today I think Alex Smith's version of 'elL has gone native Blearsite and is repeating their briefings first and second hand, for example HERE, and HERE, and HERE.

You'll be doing Iain Dale out of a job Alex. There is an election on TOMORROW people. Wes Streeting and Christine Quigley remind us of this. Only to be buried in more jockeying spin.

"Where Labour-minded people come together" was almost a slogan for the joy of the Derek Draper project-stylee simultaneous orgasm of the "on message".

But if Alex isn't careful it'll get to be an organ that is intent only on recreational fragging ... of the Labour Party. Back to the joy of safe sex, oh people's party.

Another Day Another Deller: MIF09 "Procession" Needs ...

For a decade or so from mid-80s to mid-90s I was involved in one way or another in one Manchester Festival after another. Organising, raising money, producing print, producing multimedia extravaganzas, world premieres, and (sometimes) shotgun-for-ya socio-cultural events.

With the possible exception of the Manchester Olympic Festival in 1990 and the City of Drama in 1994 this civic Festival, though generally in the top-ten nationally, even after losing the stonking Manchester Organ Festival as a major draw (er, not), this civic event was a success despite being generally very seriously under-resourced, very make-do-and-mend, very scrimp-and-save, very just-getting-away-with-it.

The Manchester International Festival in contrast has a proper budget, a proper level of ambition and scope to go with it, and MIF hit the ground running in 2007 with nationally and globally significant events. A good deal of which may have been far too up themselves to reach the working people of the hardest working town in show business.

This year's MIF 09 Procession - a work with Turner Prize winning Jeremy Deller (e.g. Orgreave recreation) - has it's feet very firmly on the ground. Good to see. You can read a little about it, here and you can read more and perhaps get involved, here.

Were your ancestors at the Peterloo Massacre on 16 August 1819? On either side of the argument, or just looking on? Get in Touch!

Were you part of the crowds that welcomed cosmonaut Yuri Gagarin to Manchester on 12 July 1961? Get in Touch!

Were you at Granada Studios on 19 March 1964 to watch Jerry Lee Lewis when he performed Whole Lotta Shakin’ Goin’ On? Get in Touch!

Did you frequent the Plaza Ballroom in the city, on Oxford Street (not Oxford Road!) in the late 1950s and early 1960s? Get in Touch!

Or any of Jimmy Saville's other nights of madness and mayhem around that time? Did you meet your future partner there, or have other interesting stories? Get in Touch!

All these - just a sample of the twenty banner-led elements of Procession - a bit too ancient or specific for you? Too much like hard work?

Here's one for the slackers ... are you quite simply an unrepentant smoker who'd like to be out and proud about that disgusting habit of yours? Get in Touch!

Breaking News: Hazel Blears U-Turns, But Did She Want To?

Just a fortnight ago Hazel Blears MP was 100% against the idea of resigning from her Ministerial role, now reports are emerging that she's tendered her resignation. Though no-one seems sure whether this is effective immediately, or from reshuffle as the Jacqui Smith announcement. Meanwhile we can report with some certainty that twelve months ago Liam Gallagher asked the barber for a Blears rather than an Asher. Pictures anon.

UPDATE 11:08: It seems to be instantaneous. Labour List have the Hazey spiel. Hat tip: @smithsky1979.

"Honest and Precise" Nadine Dorries: Slags Off Our Forces

When Nadine Dorries MP starts lecturing that: "In the battlefield of politics, it is important to be both honest and precise" I think we can all see the problem with that.

Honestly speaking Ms Nadine Dorries has no "main home", precisely none whatsoever. But she claims the Telegraph have got it wrong. And despite the proposed David Van Day "Battle of the Blond(e)s" she is currently getting away with it.

To be "honest" and "precise" very little of the political spun version of Nadine's life story actually seems to check out. And her pronouncements on abortion are of course largely bogus. Leaving aside the matter of her conversion from being the pro-choice candidate in Hazel Grove in 2001. They are just unscientific claptrap.

Nadine Dorries MP was questioned on her local newspaper letters page by the Labour PPC David Reeves over what appear, objectively speaking, to be her rather high-sided travel claims, compared to neighbouring constituencies.

In passing David mentioned his service in Iraq. He said in a letter for publication that the MPs’ expenses scandal "threatens to undermine the very democracy I fought for as a soldier in Iraq in 2003."

But the champion of "honest and precise" misquoted him at the get go. She said: “You can imagine, when I read the words ‘I fought as a soldier in Iraq’ I was quite impressed. Gosh, thought I, good job I’m the MP or I may be tempted to vote for him."

Presumably she doesn't have a vote in Woburn? As this is only her "second home"? She allegedly lives in the Cotswold town of "Chiseling Expenses" after all? But Mr Reeves' statement, as reported in Beds on Sunday rings true from beginning to end:

In a statement he said: “I am concerned that Nadine is using my service in Iraq as an attempt to deflect attention away from the unanswered questions of expenses.

All soldiers fought for democracy in Iraq, but I did not fight in combat. I spent time in Iraq on the ground and in the air with British and multi national coalition forces in my role as an Intelligence Corps soldier.”

Mr Reeves added: “I encountered several difficult and dangerous situations.

"Two of my roles included preparing for an aerial surveillance mission, and a ground inspection of the Iranian border with Danish, Dutch and Italian personnel, gathering information on narcotic smuggling.

“As you would appreciate, much of the nature of my work was secret. I spent time on board helicopters and Nimrod surveillance aircraft gathering information to assist the Commander in planning missions. I also travelled in and around Basra City and neighbouring provinces by road.

“The threat of Improvised Explosive Devices was high and real. On one occasion, I passed through a stretch of road where five minutes later an IED exploded seriously injuring several British soldiers.

“On another day my vehicle was mobbed by a crowd of protestors throwing stones. All soldiers who serve in Iraq and Afghanistan are on the front line, regardless of unit and role.”

Ms Nadine Dorries MP is belittling the service of the Territorial Army and indeed the regular Army and all other forces by quibbling over who has and has not "fought for democracy" as opposed to "fought in combat". Mr Reeves now knows that, if Ms Dorries survives calls for her de-selection, she will be quite the rattlesnake. Though hardly the guardian of honesty and precision.

Top Dollar and Mid Beds Fizz: DVD Stand vs CD Expenses Ramper?

Is @davidvanday really planning to stand in Nadine Dorries' Mid Narnia seat? And if so is that stand for selection as the Tory candidate against this raving mythomaniac? Or stand as an Independent?

There's a rather lame caption competition at "Orange" who are sponsoring the boy's complexion. But sadly Leighton Buzzard Online appear to have got cold feet.

This Guardian link has the top Dollar hope fool in his own words:

"I am very much looking forward to meeting the residents of Mid Bedfordshire, and am delighted to be visiting Woburn," he said. "It will be great to see the town that boasts the famous Woburn Abbey and Safari Park."
"However, I still urge Nadine to stand down in the wake of the expenses scandal. If she doesn't, then I will stand against her under the ticket of 'no expenses'.
"The public have had enough of these politicians. I call upon Nadine to do the decent thing and announce that she will not stand for election."

Here's Sky News, and Liberal Conspiracy, and Lib Demmer Bridget Fox who was on the radio with the blond bimbo. Van Day that is. He explained he wouldn't take expenses from the tax payer but would take subs from local businesses instead.

There have been times when reading of the launch of some local business or other on the raving mythomaniac Nadine's blog you might even think that Nadine was on to that wheeze already. Though she would also tell us that she never actually knew who donations to her association were from ... Here's my DVD caption:

Yes, it's true, I'll claim no expenses. Not one penny of taxpayers' money will cross my moat. But I'll be available for sponsorship ... in fact I've started. Close run thing with Tango, but Orange sponsor my political complexion.

Improvements, which can mention Ms Dorries, in comments please.

Trousergate Form Letters From HQ: The LOL Alternative

Clearly most Council Groups, MPs and MEPs have the gumption to write their own letters to their electorates. But circulating a rather turgid template might just get the creative juices flowing. So LOL think the GuFster protests too much.

Here is the Labour of Love alternative template. More snappy. More robust. More combative. More effective for that we'd like to think. Letters that get results. Feel free to adapt ad lib:

Dear Fellow Class Warriors

All this latest expenses hoo-hah has been a bit of a storm in a tea cup don't you think? When it comes to Labour anyway. We're the least bad of the lot. As we've probably told you before? Boom, boom!

This is a crate of tepid beer and a platter of curly sandwiches short of a feeding frenzy if you ask us. We've hardly had a taste. And the sleight of hand, quite frankly, is so slight it hardly merits the name.

Hope you're with us so far?!

We've hardly had our hand in the till at all ourselves. We've done our bit of course. In our small ways. But quite frankly we're too honest for our own good round here. No flipping, no duck houses, no luncheon vouchers, very little lippy, and very few items of women's clothing indeed.

Our boy/girlfriends' dry rot lies untreated; our wife/husband has bought their own iPhone; our sorry moats are undredged; our wisteria is rampant on our mock Tudor gable; we actually do have a main a second and a spare; and our television was picked up overnight from outside the Help the Aged in the High Street. They don't take electricals. Health and safety. Only trying to help!

My god we are miserable sinners! So miserable we've hardly managed to sin at all! You'll perhaps be disappointed, thinking you'd elected someone with a bit more chutzpah? But alas, we are but a footnote to the footnotes in the minor appendices to the annals of trousergate.

Let's all cast our minds back a few months shall we comrades? When expenses rip offs and donations fiddles were worthy of the name. But when hardly anyone noticed. Apparently all was forgiven and forgotten as 88 pence for a bath plug and a spot of partnerly porno made mighty waves.

Here's just a few that caught our eyes. And no!! We haven't got the decimal point in the wrong place:

* George Osborne MP (Con) - Substantial six-figure sum from various financiers for his office, but didn't bother to stick it in his members interests;
* Alan Duncan MP (Con) - Substantial six-figure sum from various oil interests for his office, a fat cat job with one of them, but also didn't bother to stick it in his members interests;
* Den Dover MEP (Con) - €1 Million illicitly to family firm;
* Rest of Tory MEPs (Con) - Families wallowing to dew-lapped necks in gravy;
* Derek Conway MP (Con) - Substantial six-figure sum on hand outs to the clan. Blood is thicker than water after all;
* 18 More Old Etonian Front Benchers (Con) - "Foreigners" coming out of the ears;
* Caroline Spelman MP (Con) - Triangular "constituency secretary" and "childcare" scam before that Julie Kirkbride MP had taken her first toddler steps at the game;
* "Lord" Taking the Mickey Ashcroft - A "flying liar" Vulture Capitalist cheating the rules on travel donations and swinging a cheeky eight-figure sum into the shires.

So yes, that [insert most publicised £2 to £200 "error" here] was a mistake on our part. But let's be reasonable. It was all within the rules. And many Tories insisted on putting four or five noughts on the end before they'd get up in the morning!

We'll try harder in future, don't worry. Nothing is too good for the working man/women. We know we can count on your vote. Especially since that 7 pence rise in minimum wage! That's hourly that is. More than £3 on a 46-hour week!

Yours in class war


Everyman/Woman MP

PS An apposite slogan may be added at the elected member's discretion:

- When it comes to troughing Labour're the runts of the litter!
- Tories are thieving toffee nosed bastards!
- Labour ramps are comradely and proportionate!

League Against Cruel Sports: "Tories Are Still Nasty Party"

Thirty years ago this month I packed my bags for a two-month working holiday in the Canadian Rockies, hosted by the Government of Canada's Ministry of Fisheries and Environment. We were looking after some Royal Society/NERC/GoC science at a little glacier in Alberta. Cute little thing. Name of Peyto, above from the very reclusive Caldron lake.

Point being that, arriving in Calgary in late June, shortly ahead of the annual and world famous Calgary Stampede - Numero Uno Rodeo Du Monde - we were kind of expecting something to be brewing, or not. Viz the annual and world famous Calgary Stampede tie-in beer strike.

Idea was that a "dry" Calgary Stampede was unthinkable, contributing a big slice of annual snooze and booze profits in just a week, meaning that the strike was at best headed off at the pass or at worst rounded up, roped and wrestled to the ground PDQ.

Very likely the League Against Cruel Sports would have something to say about the Stampede. "Yee Haa!" or the like. Perhaps not quite that? But, and here's a funny thing, the LACS seem to be publishing their Annual Report on Hunting around May/June time.

Coincidentally that's shortly ahead of County Council and other elections. Now, why ever would they do that? Iain Dale is a right tizzy and calls this "Shameful Conduct". Looks like "Bloody Sensible Conduct" to this blogger.

What did they discover in their judicious questions in a recent YouGov* poll?

Things like: 75% of respondents support Labour's Class War Hunting Bill. Respondents who expressed a preference think by more than 2:1 that pimping Fox Hunting makes the Tories "The Nasty Party". And 70% think the Tories are barking up the wrong damned tree with any plan to give parliamentary time to making hunting with dogs any easier than it is already.

The Press have the Press Association report.

YouGov - whose online panel you can join HERE - is of course a Company of High Tory entrepreneur and investor, not to mention former 18 Doughty Street (wiki) a failed internet TV station (home), losing Colchester PPC, and still I think Conservative Home benefactor, and Politics Home founder to boot, Stephan Shakespeare ne Kukowski.


SHAMEFUL BEHAVIOUR (above): Protestors in the Wirral nail Cameron's bushy tale. In what quite frankly, and we'll have to agree with Iain here, was very bizarre and unfair, nay shameful, behaviour they did this just as Cameron was visiting, and not some other time when it would not have been embarrassing for the poor dear.