Monday, September 07, 2009

Nadine Dorries MP: Uses Mad Bloggers to Serve Mad Writs

According to their own reports Guido Fawkes and Tory Bear have acted as avenging angels, serving the raving mythomaniac Nadine Dorries MP's mad mad mad writs on respectively (a) a broken former spin doctor who once uttered, or some say repeated from the established goss and outre unrepeatables of the lobby, some daft trash talk about madame in private email to some drinking buds and (b) the recent birther Kate Garraway, wifey of one of the fistful of co-conspirators who received said private email.

Beyond this fistful of jostling mates we have no knowledge of identified or named further recipients - apart from Paul Staines aka the blogger Guido Fawkes, and a presumed intermediary or so. And, as far as LOL can tell, no-one apart from Nadine Dorries MP herself actually even named her as having been included in this round-robin of nonsense. She outed herself and has been dining out on this stuff, between expenses tantrums and abortion lies, ever since.

On the face of it LOL don't think she is going to have much of a case here. She hasn't been damaged by this affair as far as we can see. Indeed, arguably, it has helped protect her from deeper and wider scrutiny over allowances claims that appear to take lots and lots of rent and other exes for a "second home" when Ms Dorries is unable to make much of a case for having another home at all. Never mind a "main home".

The use of two pantomime dames - "ugly sisters" would be to stretch things too far perhaps - to deliver these legal instruments is surely not going to help this flimsy negligee of a case progress. A tissue of ... tissues. We all fall down.

With Mr Dale away chatting fart in Armenia LOL are left wondering which other overweight and overwrought right-wing blogger will be employed to present Gordon Brown himself with the writ that he has been promised, all these months? And will Tom Watson MP get one too?

In the absence of any credible choice from that pool of fraternal fatheads LOL would recommend that Nadine looks further afield ... and gives that nice General "laughing boy" Gaddafi a ring. Hat tip: Tim Montgomerie, by twitter.

FOOTNOTE: We'd like to wish Bon Voyage to Nadine's eldest. She is turning her back on the unfeasible and overpaid job heading up mum's parliamentary office - properly declared though completely and utterly unblogged. And she is heading off to warmer and less nepotistical climes.

Her mum and dad will be relieved that Pippa Storm doesn't already have a broken marriage behind her, as Nads did at her age, still less with experience as an underqualified trolley dolly and a hardly trained slopping out nurse, something Nads continues to trade on and exaggerate to this day.

But they may nonetheless be a little anxious that she won't in effect elope, as they did, and ring home to say she's married within days of arriving in the Southern Hemisphere. The bookies are still sharpening their pencils on what odds to offer that unemployed graduate middle daughter - who has interned before - will get big sis's job in mum's office.

Nadine Dorries MP has a back story filled with fibs and cover ups. Her allowances DEMAND proper scrutiny and being as the invigilator is going alphabetically and has 90% of MPs GUILTY of some breach or other her runnings are presumably already looked at and found in the 90% irregular? Surely launching pantomine writs via figures of fun at this juncture, having received all manner of apologies and retractions, not to mention acres of news coverage, can only burst Nadine's bubble?

The only thing that could make things worse for her would be to find that hothead sheeshhead Donal Blaney were involved in some way in her "legal team".

UPDATE Thu 12:27: Although Guido himself used the word "writ" in his (hurriedly deleted but not lost to posterity) tweet these were in fact just letters ahead of action. They rarely lead to anything. Would be marvellous if one of the accused would shove these things or at least the more hilarious stanzas and the composer's name into the public domain. Lots more, including from LOL, at Liberal Conspiracy.


Gordon Brown said...

Hush lad, we don't need anymore smears this week

Plato said...

What have you been smoking Mr Paul?

Chris Paul said...

Don't smoke. Does Plato? Nadine? Guido?

Nadine's allowances claims have yet to be explained. Her fibs are legendary and legion. Some would say she's a Con woman.

What is to be gained from a libel action many months after the fact? Is this in fact a hoax? Were proper lawyers fighting shy of proceeding?

Madasafish said...

If all fails, kick the player and ignore the ball.

Wifflebammer said...

Well now, aren't you a nasty spiteful bitter little cunt.

Anonymous said...

This is the pits. I'm going to print this dross out and show it to the Labour candidate when he comes calling for my vote at the next election, just before I tell him to fuck off.

Joe Public said...

Despite repeated requests, Nads still refuses to explain why she thought us Taxpayers should reimburse her for money she claimed her landlord owed her.


Jimmy said...

It's certainly unusual for the claim to be served by a potential defendant. Please please please let one of them third party Guido for hawking the story. It could just be the funniest thing ever.

Ok second funniest. Funniest would be Mad Nads winning against Guido and then trying to collect.

daphnie said...

I've been away for a while but I see you are still peddling the same old impenetrable dross Chris.

Keep it up!

Chris Paul said...

iM-penetrable Daftknee? What can you mean? It's simple:

1. Nadine has used daft blogger boys to serve daft writs;
2. That's strange and will inform court that this is a but a pantomime;
3. No writ yet for Gordon;
4. Nadine is a lifelong fibber;
5. Her allowances look hooky;
6. Her daughters get jobs with her;
7. This can only end in tears, for Nadine

Anonymous said...

She also tweeted a vile smear on GB. She's the cunt wifflebammer.

jailhouselawyer said...

Besides Donal Blarney I suspect Alex Deane is part of this Tory plot to get Labour into the courts.

Jimmy said...

who he?